Unsolved Mistakes
by Coldplayplaystheworld
Summary: Elizabeth moved to London after Mr.Darcy's surprise proposal, but she relizes she loves him and missess her family but she does not know what is awaiting her!
1. Chapter 1

I gazed out the window touched by the beautiful scenery. The sun was just peering over the mountains setting the sky a blaze with pink and faint purple. The new light caught the ponds particles forcing it to dance in a breathtaking show of liquid crystals. I sat and wrote about what I saw, not ever wanting to miss a morning in London. I quietly began to ponder why I came here, after Mr. Darcy proposed to me. I could hardly stand it, the man who was usually hidden behind a facade, poring out his sola to me while all I could see was the man hidden behind terrible rumors. I could not face my family after I turned him down, the lectures my mother would give me about being dishonorable and stubborn. So like a coward I ran away to London to work for an apprentice at a old printing press. I just wanted to start a new, escape him and the mixed feelings I had for him. But even now as I sat in the tiny shop, so many many miles away from Mr. Darcy his face and voice danced into my thoughts. I was planning to go back soon, and woo him some how. I would find a way to keep my dignity and have him fall for me again. I just wanted to see him speak to me like he did months ago, tell me he loved me. Or perhaps it was not him I wanted to love me but any man, a human of the male species. It did not particularly matter as long as he loved me with a love that I saw in Mr. Darcy's eyes, because now I know that the rumors I had heard about him were far from true. Every ill thing that I had heard about him erratic been made up and brought to my ears. And I, being so hot headed and quick tempered believed them all. And when he was on his knees asking me to marry him all I could say was 'he was the last man I would ever marry.' my cruelness stung me now.

I stopped thinking about it. Every day as I watched the sun rise I tell my self im going to go back, to my family, and to him. But every night I lose my courage and that is why I am still here. Frustrated I jumped up, and trudged outside I needed to walk to clear my mind. There was not path out side the small press just barren field that stretched endlessly into till it seemed to touch the sky. I raised my skirt so I could feel the damp grass brush along my ankles, and make me shiver as only the morning air could. I looked out at the mountains protruding into the sky like jagged daggers. By now the sun had risen by was still weak and only sent a soft yellow glow over the valley, the scene took my breath away. Looking at everything I began to miss my family terribly. Jane would always walk with me, hand in hand as we discuses things trivial and unimportant just to pass the time. I missed Pa sitting in his red veinal chair for hours reading and smoking his pipe. I even missed my erratic mother always moving always doing something. I needed them and my hole inside suddenly tore open leaving me defenseless.

I could not run fast enough back to the press. I ran to my little room and through all of my things into a burlap sack. I wrote a note to Mrs. Shire telling her about my departure and thanking her for a prosperous internship. My stomach was churning and was full of butterflies. I flew down the stairs and could have run all the way home.

I was weary from my ride, but not weary enough to stop slow me down as I ran through the house looking for my family. No one was there. A little disappointed that I had come at a bad time I climbed to my room to find perfect Jane perched on our bed with a book in had. I flew to her before she could even look up, and embraced her in my arms. She hugged me back with fervor.

"Oh Lizzy don't leave me again" she murmured into my shoulder.

"I wont it was purely excruciating." I said breathless I was so happy to have her close again.

"Where is every one?" I asked after our greeting was over.

"They are at Mr. Bingley's." she sighed.

"Oh..and why did you not join them, are you still fond of Mr. Bingley." I asked

"Yes I am still fond of him." her cream cheeks blushed scarlet.

"However, Mr. Bingley is not there only Mr. Darcy." his name sent chills down my spine. He was still here and not very far away.

"Oh," I said trying to stay composed.

"Why are they only visiting Mr. Darcy." I preyed

"Because it would not be proper for Kitty to go by herself." Jane huffed at me plopping back down onto the bed. I was confused why would my younger sister be wanting to make private trips to see Mr. Darcy.

"Im confused." I stammered. Looking to Jane for some guidance.

"Well, they are engaged, they meaning Kitty and Mr. Darcy, he asked her about two weeks ago. It was quite sudden actually they barley even talked. Now Kitty is just head over heals for him but you can tell he is not quite returning the affection. There is a ghost in his eyes, something holding him back." I sucked in my breath trying not to lose it. I was not even going to lie that part of the reason I came back was for him. My chest was on fire and I curled my arms around my abdomen keeping my self together. I loved him! Now I could not have him, I waited much to long and now every day of my existence I would have to watch him with my sister while I lived in a loveless existence. Jane just stared at me with agaonized eyes trying to decipher my break down, I did not care if she saw me fall apart but I would have to pull myself together for every one else


	2. Chapter 2

Three days later I sat in the parlor with my sisters and my parents. My Father was in his chair and mother was nervously rushing around the room like a humming bird with a broken wing. The house had to be spotless for Mr. Darcy and Mr. Bingley's visit. I had noticed since Mr. Bingley was back in town Jane's cheeks were more pink and there was more of a sparkle in her eyes. I sat on the edge of the couch reading what ever I could find in the house, to preoccupy my time. I heard someone knock at the door, and my heart leapt into my throat but I stayed perfectly sill. I heard two people enter, but I stayed at the edge of the couch until I felt my mothers fingers clench onto my arm thrusting me up.

"Be polite." she hissed into my ear. I did not say anything and gently pulled my arm away from her grasp. The two men walked in and I caught my breath. They greeted us with a nod and a smile. But when Mr. Darcy's eyes met mine his eyes turned to pure confusion and it even seemed like relief colored his face. No one had told anyone that I had returned. His eyes stayed on my face for at least ten seconds, until they flickered away. We all sat down in the now tense atmosphere that only Darcy and I could feel, but it was not tense but more like electric pules.

"Good Afternoon Mr. Darcy, Mr. Bingley." Mother said smiling at them

"Good Afternoon to you as well" Mr. Bingley said, Darcy just smiled weakly.

"We always love your company!" she exclaimed her face fixated in a permanent smile, that was a bit embarrassing.

"Thank you." Bingley replied a bit uncomfortable now.

"Mr. Darcy you look well." Kitty said sheepishly smiling his way, I could not miss the way he cringed when she said his name. I also noticed that Kitty was not totally enthraled with him the way true love should be.

"As do you." Mr. Darcy replied meeting her eyes for only a moment, then flickered to my face.

"Our dear Lizzy is back, did you notice." Mother said looking at the two men.

"Yes." they both said together.

"How are you Elizabeth." Mr. Darcy asked his face intense smoldering me.

"Im good, and you."

"Excellent." he was fighting a smile now.

"Not that we do not enjoy you but is there an intent behind this visit or just pure social interaction." my mother pried. They were both silent until Mr. Bingley stood.

"Yes... Jane." he turned to her she looked up at him with love in her eyes.

"Will you walk with me?" he held his hand out to her. She just nodded.

"Ladies, gentleman." Mr. Bingley added nodding while still holding Jane's hand. We watched them walk out side and then everyone rushed to the window to see them walk onto the path into the woods. I did not move and neither did Mr. Darcy we just looked at each other.

"A little scandalous don't you think." my mother added when she came to sit back down.

"Not at all." I chimed.

"And why not Lizzy."

"I am not blind, you are not blind, no one in this room is blind they are in love and walking down a path together is far from scandalous." I said.

"But is there a meaning of proposal behind this walk." Lydia added inserting herself into the conversation.

"Perhaps, but it would not matter what if he merely wanted to walk with her" I asked

"I do not think he should drag her all the way outside, for a stroll." she looked away from me her nose in the air. I was about to rebut until Mother added.

"Enough girls."

"No this is interesting, should a man come over to a womens house and just talk to her, walk with her without any real intent, other than the intent to just be with her." Mr. Darcy said catching every one off guard.

"Why not, if two people are fond of each other then having each other as company is sinless." I said.

"Now, say you want to find out if the significant other likes you, and enjoys your company how do you go about this." he asked his eyes on my face.

"Figure it out, love is trial and error, interpret he, or she's body language and act upon it." I answered.

"I see, what if you are wrong." he asked a playful glint in his eyes.

"That is the error part, and if you really love someone you will try again." I was almost out of breath now. Talking to him was leaving me breathless. Kitty jumped up clapping her hand

"How marvelous you two are already squabbling like brother and sister how fun when you are brother and sister." I cringed away only we would now are debate was far from that.


	3. Chapter 3

Mr. Darcy left when Mr. Bingley dropped Jane off at the porch but not before kissing her hand. Darcy kissed Kitty on the cheek and nodded at all of us his eyes lingering on my face for only a few moments, but enough to see the torture there. He was torn as well. When Jane came back into the house she only talked for a few moments then excused herself to our room. I followed quickly after her.

"Jane." I asked with a questionable tone

"Yes Lizzy." her face was solom and I was wondering what he had said to her.

"So what did you two talk about." I asked

"nothing much, the weather, and past festivities other than that nothing quite exiting." she said with a very monotone sound.

"And does that upset you Jane dear?" I asked worried now. She kept her eyes low and stared at her fingers.

"Does it?" I asked again eager now.

"Yes!" she almost shouted.

"Why is he playing these games! I love him Elizabeth and he keeps taking me on walks and inviting me to dinner but he wont marry me. Is our relation ship just for temporary gain." she was crying now.

"I will not have it, either he marry me or Mr. Bingley needs to leave me alone and stop toying me along." she wiped her eyes and looked at me.

"I think he is just nervous Jane, the way he looks at you is undeniable affection, and who could blame him, but your right don't let him string you along but don't give up on him either he may make mistakes but forgive him" My voice broke on the last words because it applied to my own life. Mr. Darcy and I, he made mistakes, confused me, hurt me, looked down on me but he had so many redeeming qualities. And I love him, I could not deny it now. I could not even think about the pain I would be going through, when Kitty walked down the isle and married him while I stood as her maid of honor secretly loving her groom. I had always been so passionate about what I felt and following my instincts. However, I could not in this situation. No matter how much I wanted to be with him and tell him how I felt I could not betray my sister, I would not betray my sister.

A few days later, the weather was clear and the clouds moved from the sun unleashing its beautiful power on the nature it touched. I could not resist taking a walk. I did not stop walking until I came upon a small grove of trees barley covering an acre, I saw a path going into the trees and followed intrigued. It was much cooler in the small forest, and smelled of damp moss and dirt. Up ahead I saw someone and stopped, startled by the sudden presence. The figure was sitting on a bench just a ways off the path. Cautiously I approached the person to find Mr. Bingley leaning his head on the back board with his eyes closed. Not wanting to disturb him I tried to walk by quietly.

"Elizabeth." I heard him murmur

"Oh hello Mr. Bingley." I felt embarrassed like I had been caught doing something foolish.

"What are you doing out here." he asked sitting up straight.

"Its not that far from my home." I replied "What are you doing out here?"

"Thinking was all he said and laid tilted his head back I had never seen him so relaxed and un cultured.

"Thats nice, im sorry I intruded." I nodded my head and began to walk away.

"No Lizzy stay." I was so shocked at turned around but he was not joking.

"Ummm okay." I almost whispered. I sat by him my back ridged. He did not speak for a minute in a very awkward silence. Then he sat up and looked at me.

"I tried so hard yesterday." he murmured

"So so hard." it was like he was speaking to himself but he brought his eyes back to my face.

"Lizzy your sister is so amazing, everything I could ever want and need, so perfect I just cant do it, I just cant ask her to marry me." Was this his problem? He felt inadequate for Jane. I was so happy I was worried it was because he did not like her enough. He must have seen the thrill in my eyes.

"What?" he asked sounding nervous.

"Thats all!" I giggled.

"Thats all that is holding you back! Your inadequacy!" I exclaimed

"I suppose." he was wary now wondering what my mental problem was. I calmed down and looked at him.

"Don't worry about that." I said softly.

"She is amazing I will not deny it, but so are you and you love her." his mouth was in a tight line but his eyes were hopeful.

"Yes." was all he said.

"Thats all that matters."I replied. I smiled at him and got up. He got up as well facing me.

"Thank you dear Elizabeth Bennet."

"Of course." I said, I could not help my smiling. I began walking the other way.

"Elizabeth." he called I turned to him we were about ten feet away.

"_As his friend, don't give up on him I think he needs you_." then his face twisted into a grimace.

All I could do is stutter, could he be talking about Mr. Darcy, he had to be!

"Good day Elizabeth." and then Mr. Bingley was gone because I could not see him anymore. I was so dumfounded that he would have the audacity to say something like that. However, in a sick and twisted way I was thrilled, because I loved him and he loved me. Well, I though he loved me hoped he loved me. Then a thought hit me. The way Kitty reacted when she talked to Mr. Darcy when she looked at him. It was not a look of affection or even love, no nothing close to love. It was a look of acquaintance and perhaps forced friendship. And for some reason this gave me a glimmer of hope. Perhaps me loving him could ultimately save my sister.


	4. Chapter 4

**I got a comment on the fact that Mr. Darcy would never propose to Kitty. Now this is probably true, but if you are thinking this, in my mind, and my writing he is marring her to fill the void Elizabeth left. This may not be totally realistic, but have an open mind :)**

"Jane!" I yelled as I burst into my home

"Jane where are you!" I ran to our room and she was sitting in a chair reading verses.

"Jane, guess who just pored his soul at my feet."

"Ummm who." she asked wary not lifting her eyes from her book. Frustrated I bounded over to her, pulling her face up into my hands forcing her eyes to look at me.

"Mr. Bingley." her eyes titened.

"What..." she started but I cut her off.

"Let me explain." I told her the whole conversation. Not leaving out any words, facial expressions, or pauses. Though I left out the last thing he told me not wanting to address Jane with that quite yet. She was quiet for a few minutes just looking at me but through me.

"So he loves me." she stammered.

" He really loves me." she jumped to her feet catching me in an embrace.

"Really truly." she exclaimed jumping.

"Yes, forever and ever." I sighed finally looking at her bright beautiful face. She was just so full of light and joy it knocked me breathless. This is what life was about seeing the people you love more than life happy, and helping them be happy. Perhaps Jane would do the same for me. Or just give me advice that would set me on the correct path. Only she could give me harsh critizicum and I would still know she irrevocably loved me.

"Jane I whispered." pulling her to the bed. She had not yet caught her breath he brilliant blue eyes dancing.

"Yes." she sighed. I pause waiting for it to come for me.

"I love him." Jane misunderstood and shot off the bed.

"Elizabeth Bennett how could you love Mr. Bingley I though you wanted me to be happy." before I had the chance to speak she calmed down and said.

"Sorry, I just exploded I just did not expect it, but you loving him" I clamped my hand over her mouth appalled.

"Jane I don't love , I love Mr. Darcy." I almost screamed.

"And that's any better, he is marring Kitty." burning tears flowed down my cheeks.

"I don't know Jane, I don't know but they don't even look like they love each other. Its like they are being forced to like each other!" I buried my head in the pillows and cried.

I felt Jane's hands on my back soothing me.

"Lizzy." she whispered.

"They don't love each other, she's fond of him but he seems appalled around her, it hurts me Liz but im not going to do anything about it." I sat up and looked at her.

"So what I just watch them be married the rest of my life, and go over to their house, watch their kids run around and look at the life that should be mine." I yelled.

"Yes!" Jane yelled in my face.

"That is exactly what you do, she is your sister, stop being selfish." that hurt but it was true. I flopped back onto the bed and let out a loud sigh.

"Alright."

"Lizzy im sorry, but sometimes you just have to be bigger then what you really want, for the people around you."

"Yeah I know." I whispered

"Do you?" she asked. Just then we heard running up the path down stairs and frantic yelling and screaming. We both ran down stairs to a very strange picture.

A lavish chariot was sitting by our fir tree with a stunned Mr. Darcy standing by the horses looking at Kitty and Momma yelling on the path that leads to the door.

"I will not marry him Mom." Kitty yelled pointing to Mr. Darcy with a stern finger.

"Why not, by God kitty we have nothing, look at what you are giving up." she screeched at Kitty.

"Im giving up a horrible life to a man I don't love." she screamed back and with that ran into the house crying. Mom just stood star struck on the patio. I looked at Mr. Darcy his expression unreadable. Then a memory flashed across his face, the same kind of utter rejection delivered by a different person. We both shivered.

Sorry this chapter took ages to write! Comment PLZ


	5. Chapter 5

It had been days sense Kitty's temper tantrum, but she had not budged an inch. Every time Mother tried to talk to her, or persuade her, she would run away crying screeching that she was not going to get married under cruel circumstances. We half expected to hear from Mr. Darcy, or mother expected to hear from him. We all know he did not love her and he was probably relieved. We were all very tense though wondering what the next move would be, so when Mr. Bingley and Darcy arrived at our front porch, Mr Darcy standing behind his best friend not trying to hide his embarrassment we were all relieved.

When we were all situated in the parlor facing each other surprisingly the tension was lessened not increased because we were all finally going to talk to each other. Mr. Darcy was never one to mince words so he got right to the point.

"Kitty, im sorry if I hurt you, but from our conversation the other day im guessing you still are calling off the wedding." I could not miss the hint of a smile in his voice.

Kitty grumbled and looked around the room.

"This is a embarrassing conversation, I hate how everything is so public in this house!" Kitty hissed at us.

"Kitty control your temper." Mother hissed back. Kitty just sat staring at nothing.

"Thank you for your kindness Mr. Darcy." Kitty said smoothly.

"However, under the circumstances of our marriage and our proposal I just can not marry you." her eyes were burning with tears, but they never escaped her eyes.

"I understand." Mr. Darcy stood dusting off his trousers, but Mr. Bingley sat not moving looking at his hand.

"Mr. Bingley shall we leave." Mr. Darcy asked his hand on his friends shoulder.

"No, not yet." he stood looking at Jane.

"Jane, can I talk to you." his extreme nervousness was seeping through his poorly controlled voice. Her doe eyes wide with curiosity and exitment.

"Of course." she responded weakly. He led her hand in hand into the reading room. Everyone ran to press their ears to the door. I stood back already knowing what was going to happen and just looked out the window. I felt someone's presence behind me, and electricity bolted through my veins. We did not speak but were hyper aware of each other. Jane out their hands entwined her cheeks stained with tears his eyes bright with exitment his pale skin flushed with happiness.

"So...." Mother stared prying into what was going on.

"Well..." Jane began

"Mr. Bingley and I are getting married." she could not hide the perfect love in her voice.

Everyone began hugging her and Mr. Bingley jumped out of the circle without letting go of her hand. I just stood my heart bursting with happiness this is what I needed to see right now, that true love was here and still real. Behind me Mr. Darcy came closer to me his lips almost at my ear.

"True happiness is achievable Elizabeth." his breath sent a shiver through me, and I stood and watched him leave with Mr. Bingley. Darcy's eyes on me and Bingley's eyes on Jane.


End file.
